Panicitement (Pan-I-Site-ment) - the sensation of fear and anticipation where it is impossible to tell if it is PANIC or EXCITEMENT that you feel, and most probably a sizeable dose of both!
Moments of dread, horror, excited anticipation, & numbing shock at how little time there remains until I'll be standing at the start line (admittedly for 4 hours before the race starts). A little over 11 days remains and there is much to be done still.
All those last minute items like finding warm clothes for New York and warmer clothes for Toronto the week after along with making sure I list out all my running gear so I don't forget anything. Then there are the practical steps like money, international roaming for emergencies, getting in touch with people to visit, working out what to do in the days leading up to the race (more excitement than panic thinking through this), looking forward to meeting the Team World Vision USA runners on the Friday night & planning just how much sleep I can actually get on the plane!
On the flip side are the doubts that creep in - Will they let me into the USA? (I have changed my surname since the last time I was there). Can I make the distance? (YES! Even if I have to walk the whole way!). Will the tightness that runs from the middle of my back down my right leg to my ankle making it painful to run and sometimes walk present itself again on race day? (It has done so twice in the last month, most recently this weekend just gone).
And through it all I return to 2 things. Firstly God is control and I rely on him. Secondly, even if I have to walk the whole course I am crossing that finish line! At 6km an hour that's only 7 hours of walking :)
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